In the year 2000...

En av mina favoritfeatures i Conan O'Briens kvällsshow var "in the year 2000", när en gäst och Conan tog på sig lustiga kragar och lyste med en ficklampa i ansiktet och gjorde lustiga förutsägelser om vad som skulle hända i det nya millenniet. Inslaget blev så populärt att det fortsatte även efter att år 2000 både kommit och gått.

Här om dagen hittade jag en lista med några av mina favoriter som jag nu vill dela med mig till er av:

In the year 2000...

...bandits will attack queen Elisabeth. To save her life she will have to call on the knights sworn to defend her - Elton John, Mick Jagger and Paul McCartney.

...freedom fries and freedom toast will go back to being french fries and french toast when oil is discovered just outside of Paris.

...terrorism experts will reveal that dirty bombs are just regular bombs that just enjoy sleeping with high school chicks.

...babies will reveal that "googoo" and "gaga" is actually babyspeak for "I love the films of Dolph Lundgren".

...after their recent appearence on the MTV video music awards, Guns'n'roses will be forced to change their name to "Chubby McGoo and the guys who aren't Slash".

...zoologists will discover that when gorillas grunt "oo oo ah ah" they are really just making fun of Sylvester Stallone.

...a charterplane carrying a soccerteam will crash in the Andes, and even though there is plenty of food available, the survivors will resort to cannibalism to stay on the Atkins diet.

...Michael Jackson's son, Prince Michael II, will write a memoir in which he wistfully recalls, that one glorious moment on the balcony when he nearly escaped.

...Bill Paxton and Bill Pullman will finally give up and decide to become the same guy.

...in one of the most negative, ruthless presidential campaigns ever, candidates will run ads accusing their opponents of coming up with the idea for Jar-Jar Binks.

...an even more shocking home video tape of Pamela and Tommy Lee will come out. This one featuring the two of them adding and subtracting.

...scientists will discover the reason for the Loch Ness monster's seclusion. It doesn't like scottish people.

...Bill Clinton will be slapped with the most embarrassing paternity suit of all time, when Monica Lewinsky gives birth to a pack of Marlboro Lights.

...Paris, France and Paris, Texas, will change places. The Louvre will thereafter be known as "that danged barn with no cows but lotsa fancy pictures".